Today, I got called to your run of the mill, sub-standard, smelly, group living facility... We got called out for priority 1 (serious sounding) CVA or Stroke. We get on scene, and no one knows anything about our arrival. We find out that the room that we are looking for is not only upstairs, but that they don't have an elevator.
We grab our stuff and head up stairs, and down the hall to find a 44y/o F (y/o= year old) laying in bed, in a seemingly clean-ish looking room. When we knock on the door and state that the ambulance is here, she raises her left hand and starts shaking it as if she is doing some one handed jazz hands routine. I walk up and ask her what the problem seems to be. She states that I be having a stroke. I quickly administer our field stroke exam, and find nothing abnormal.... I ask her why she thinks that she is having a stroke. She says that she has a history of "TI's." Hmm, thats a new one on me... I thought they were TIA's, but I've been wrong before. (TIA is generally referred to as a "mini" stroke. The symptoms generally resolve themselves with in about 48-72 hrs.) There is a couple in the room and they look like they may be some kind of zoo keepers for this establishment. I look at the male and ask if he knows her history, and if she really does have a history of TIA's. He looks at me blankly. Excellent, the blind leading the blind....
I attach the monitor and find that this pt's vital signs are extremely stable and look nothing like that of someone having an actual stroke. I ask her again what are the exact symptoms that make her think that she is having a stroke, she says, the leff side of my mouth is numb. I say ok, are you hurting anywhere? She denies... I ask her if she thinks she can walk to the cot, then tell her it's down stairs. She says, No, my legs are no good. My partner looks around, seeing no wheelchair or transport devices, asks how she gets around. The pt raises her arms and says, I got me a spiritual wheelchair. Resisting the undeniable urge to smile, I tell her that we don't have room in the ambulance for a spiritual wheelchair and that she will have to walk, she says ok, I disconnect the monitor. I'm fairly certain that I will go to hell if I re-enact a scene from an Evangelical healing when they smack them in the head and the paralyzed walk and the dead rise...
I reach for the pt's hand and say, Let's go. She is actively trying to stay completely flat in bed. I give her hand a little squeeze and repeat myself. She springs up and takes off at a brisk pace. One of the firefighter's near the door grabs her and and she drags him down the hall, down the stairs and to the cot. When she gets close to the cot, she instinctively let's go of the fire fighter's wrist, then jumps on the cot. I'm a few steps behind, and trying to compose myself. My partner and I get to the business of buckling her up and she start's to have another "stroke." She raised her hand and starts the jazz hand's routine again and I grab her wrist and tell her to "STOP. NO MORE. You are not having a stroke." She puts her hands down and they stayed there for the rest of the trip, and into the ER.
While giving the hospital a quick head's up about the interesting pt that they had coming their way, I state that pt doesn't have any symptoms of a stroke nor a history, pt yells out, I don't know where you went to school, but you better check yo self.
Oh, Awesome, Crazy and an attitude... Transport uneventful... Upon arrival, care turned over to RN staff and verbal report given to accepting RN. Signed, printed and back in service. Whoops, there goes my auto-pilot.
No comments:
Post a Comment